“I hate you!” The turmoil inside my child was off the charts. I hadn’t realized that the bad behavior my husband and I had dealt with lately was a symptom of the emotional “lava” bubbling in their soul. They’d been bullied years before. The loss of people dear to our child hadn’t helped. It’s hard for a hurting child to make sense of new job opportunities and going away to college.
Unraveled. That’s how I felt during that season. Instead of responding in gentleness, I’d begun to react to this child in fear and anger. So after I heard “I hate you”, I was relieved. I heard the words but more importantly I looked into their eyes. God shined a light and I realized that wise discipline does nothing to a broken soul.
Besides prayer the next months were a crash course in tending to the emotional landscape of a hurting child AND letting God cultivate our souls as well. In this 3 hour webinar Doug and I focus on healthy ways to demonstrate and process anger, disappointment, grief, and vulnerability in family life. Here’s an excerpt: